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... your kids never grow up from drawing cars like right angled boxes
... shopping for new furniture in safe-vault store
... never get a speeding ticket
... actually you never get a speeding ticket because where you are speeding are no cameras
... frequently leaving highway 5 meters before or after exit road
... use approaching ambulance car as excuse to leave road and drive on grass
... calling TD4 "too fashionable with many comfort thingies nobody can ever need"
... calling Wrangler and G-Class a soccer Mum's SUVs
... separating cars into following categories: small/commuter car (D90), Family car (D110), trucks (D130) and disposables (all other)
... on hiking trips you annoy everybody saying "nice trail..." or "could have drive up here"
... you eventually in night walk back down and everybody wakes up morning with you parked next to their tents
... calling your girlfriends instead of name by height in inches as 55 or 60
... you are deaf (ouch, sorry)
... your reasons justifying your choice in front of your partner includes "but but military use them" or "yea yea, camel trophy would sure chose your lexus, lame"
... your backpack looks like spare tire
... when jogging and going to leave the sidewalk, you sit down and deflate your Jordans
... you can buy all spare parts for your car in regular hardware shop
... drive with open window
... drive with open window to slap hands with defender driver driving towards you
... all photos of your car are weirdly tilted
... on all photos which are not tilted is your car upside down
... daily annoying other garage renters with trail of mud and grass left
... you proudly come to work with your brand new car and first reaction of co-workers is "woa, cool, didnt know you are into old timers!" (true story)
... have two big stones in your garage to park on
... NEVER park in designated parking place
... you never bother to check your car when you hit something when parking
... constantly looking for cars in trouble to save them and groups of people to haul them
... you never understood reasons for barriers around parking places. why would anybody use just speed bump for bordering
... you have one winch front, one back and one portable to get you back on wheels
... your tires are rated 10/90 road/offroad even though you drive 90% on road
... you call M-class, X5 and Cayenne "combis"
... when after three years your wife says "i think i am starting to get used to and like our defender" you jump two meters high, rush out of the door and come back in Unimog
... you are on wanted list in 20 states for misunderstanding of real meaning of "drive through" restaurant
... saved baywatch cars at least twice and agricultural tractors at least 20 times in your life
... every tire change round you pick more offroad designated tires, because "you never know"...
... you got cat stuck in your tire tread pattern and she lives
You've been driving Defender too long when...
Land Rover Fine Art Exhibition and Calendar
