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My world weary Defender 90X, after a drunken weaving route around Europe and the ocean, finally made it from the port to the dealer! It is almost six months to the day since I ordered it. Alas, there is a snag. It gets to the dealer and during checkout it has a critical fault. Apparently it needs a new Telematics cable. None available in the US, perhaps the UK has one they might send, eventually. It is apparently made from special wire derived from Platypus bills. At least it is much closer now in an actual location I can visit. No idea when I can actually take delivery. They did send a picture though.
In the meantime I hope I get it before I leave for Namibia. Driving from Windhoek to Cape Town. Stopping in the Tankwa Desert. Got to build a heliport for the AfrikaBurn event and relax during the drunken 7 day party there. Probably should finish the heliport before I start drinking. Taking over a month for the trip.
It could be worse. Imagine waiting 2 years for your car and then the dealer tells you the ship is adrift and on fire like those VW and Porsche owners found out this week.
The whole thing has become a family joke. It started at Burning Man, where the owner of several Bay Area dealerships saw my 97 Defender at the airport (I used to build it for ORG). We where chatting and he loved the vehicle. He said I should sell it real soon. He drove the prototype new Defender and it could possibly ruin the market for the old Defenders. I took his advice and sold the 97 a year or so later, for actually more than this tricked out new one. Now that event shocked my wife, since she actually loathed the old ones. They hated each other and she couldn't believe that somebody would pay that much for one. I really couldn't either, especially since I paid almost $800 for my first Series IIA, a '72 (the last of that era imported to USA). I actually sold that one within a year for an astounding profit of $1000 (hey it was a different time). I sold it because my then fiancé hated it. Her father was the Porsche Audi VW distributer in the USA, so he imparted strong opinions about vehicles to her. I don't know how she had any opinions about any car, considering she drove a different new one every two weeks. I was a Geology student, I needed a 4x4. I actually went and replaced it with another Series IIA within the year. Her father was livid. What I was supposed to drive a 911 Porsche out in the field?
Time marches on and the new Defender is delayed, delayed, delayed in its release. Finally though, they release it. I rather liked the PR, since they drove pretty much the exact route I am taking in Namibia for their PR stunt. I go every year as part of a research project and the Afrikaburn event. My bud and I went over to the Scottsdale dealership when it was first released. COVID has just burst upon the world and the dealer was handing out masks so we could come in and see it. They only had two, one was a static display, prototype not street legal and one that drove. So we checked it out. It was not a Defender of yore, which is not necessarily a bad thing. Being practicable I inquired of the price, not bad, even the top end one was way cheaper than the Range Rover. Then the sales guy edged in the fact they where adding a markup of, I think it was, $15k. I blinked and asked again. Yep, I heard it right. So my bud and I exited. I mopped too many floors in college. Even though I was on a full ride scholarship to UCLA, it didn't begin to cover what it cost to live in Westwood. So I was a Beverly Hills Janitor. There was also the thing about being in geology, it isn't a cheap major. Yeah all the school expenses where covered, but it didn't cover the cost of the field gear and gas driving out to the field all the time 3 or 4 days a week. Some of you may have noticed that LA is pretty much covered, for miles around, with pavement. So we had to go really far afield to learn out skills. I digress.
Eventually the 'bite' part of the Defender kind of went away. Except there where almost none in Scottsdale and only a Handful in Mission Viejo. I would fly down to Scottsdale when one approaching what I wanted was there. It would be sold by the time I got there. I would go out to Mission Viejo, since I have property in Laguna Beach. They would sell out. Eventually my wife was along on one of the trips. The 90's had hit and I really just wanted a 90, she a 110. So in an unusual twist of fate, both a 90 and 110 where there at the same time. She got to drive both. She really did't like the 110, way too big. I didn't either. I like small and maneuverable. If I need a big car for whatever, I'll rent one from Enterprise. I don't have larva to shift around anymore, so the 90 works perfect. It is really the better field vehicle, lot more nimble. So I go back and forth several times, always missing something remotely close. The joke is starting to build momentum in the family. My oldest son is a mining engineer in Oz and my youngest is a NDT engineer. So they both spend a tiny amount of time in the field as well. They are both, "just get something," the Range Rover is getting really long in the tooth. I really can't stomach to actually pay money for a Toyota. Every one I have been given (I get vehicles abroad for my contracts) has crumbled before my eyes or blown its transmission (I have had four Landcruisers blow their trannies). I'm not too terribly thrilled to be driving a Hilux in Namibia, it is what is given to me, but they are not what people think. I have actually had one throw a brake caliper! Their interior is really cheap and everything comes off in your hand. They just couldn't find me a Ford Ranger (Land Rovers are not for rent) the new ones are passable in the field. Use them in both SA and Oz and seem to hold up provided you get decent tires on them. At least this Hilux is supposed to have a locking rear diff. I suppose it will blow up on me for a treat. I really won't forget the SPOT transmitter this year.
I just got tired of waiting for one in the color I wanted, something close to the interior and options I thought where kinda cool. I could not stomach yet another green Land Rover (going on three so far) I'm done with grey and white had those. Had a bright silver RR in Qatar, and a gold P63. Surprisingly the gold works well with the snow crud on the car, not an option. I finally after the third trip to Mission Viejo, no joy, I gave in and ordered one at Scottsdale. That started the jokes, it just keeps having some kind of issue all along the way. It even had to hang out crossing the canal waiting for the tsunami! Then another cable, the first of a series in the port (23 days in port). Now it gets to the dealer DOA. Believe me, the kids have been piping in about the burning boat. I suppose if my prospective father in law was still around, he would be having a stroke about now.
So lets see if they can use something besides Platypus, I'll suggest they try the quills of the Echidna. It appears I got all the Eagle Beak inlays I ordered. I think, but I will know for sure. Got to go down the mountain to Phoenix next week. I shall visit it in the hospital, maybe bring a card. I have to drop off the 206H engine for inspection and both of the propellers for overhaul. The Range Rover looks super silly when I put the prop on the roof rack, kind of like one of those old propeller beanies. If this truck does not get released before the trip I will never live this down. The sales dude called on Friday, no word from UK. I think the cable, while of exotic materials for sure, is actually made in the Ukraine. Perhaps Land Rover Special Vehicles unit has contacts with the partisans who may be able to spirt it across the lines. I remain ever hopeful. I am fairly sure their is more comedy in store with this truck, the Universe is always laughing behind my back.
The whole thing has become a family joke. It started at Burning Man, where the owner of several Bay Area dealerships saw my 97 Defender at the airport (I used to build it for ORG). We where chatting and he loved the vehicle. He said I should sell it real soon. He drove the prototype new Defender and it could possibly ruin the market for the old Defenders. I took his advice and sold the 97 a year or so later, for actually more than this tricked out new one. Now that event shocked my wife, since she actually loathed the old ones. They hated each other and she couldn't believe that somebody would pay that much for one. I really couldn't either, especially since I paid almost $800 for my first Series IIA, a '72 (the last of that era imported to USA). I actually sold that one within a year for an astounding profit of $1000 (hey it was a different time). I sold it because my then fiancé hated it. Her father was the Porsche Audi VW distributer in the USA, so he imparted strong opinions about vehicles to her. I don't know how she had any opinions about any car, considering she drove a different new one every two weeks. I was a Geology student, I needed a 4x4. I actually went and replaced it with another Series IIA within the year. Her father was livid. What I was supposed to drive a 911 Porsche out in the field?
Time marches on and the new Defender is delayed, delayed, delayed in its release. Finally though, they release it. I rather liked the PR, since they drove pretty much the exact route I am taking in Namibia for their PR stunt. I go every year as part of a research project and the Afrikaburn event. My bud and I went over to the Scottsdale dealership when it was first released. COVID has just burst upon the world and the dealer was handing out masks so we could come in and see it. They only had two, one was a static display, prototype not street legal and one that drove. So we checked it out. It was not a Defender of yore, which is not necessarily a bad thing. Being practicable I inquired of the price, not bad, even the top end one was way cheaper than the Range Rover. Then the sales guy edged in the fact they where adding a markup of, I think it was, $15k. I blinked and asked again. Yep, I heard it right. So my bud and I exited. I mopped too many floors in college. Even though I was on a full ride scholarship to UCLA, it didn't begin to cover what it cost to live in Westwood. So I was a Beverly Hills Janitor. There was also the thing about being in geology, it isn't a cheap major. Yeah all the school expenses where covered, but it didn't cover the cost of the field gear and gas driving out to the field all the time 3 or 4 days a week. Some of you may have noticed that LA is pretty much covered, for miles around, with pavement. So we had to go really far afield to learn out skills. I digress.
Eventually the 'bite' part of the Defender kind of went away. Except there where almost none in Scottsdale and only a Handful in Mission Viejo. I would fly down to Scottsdale when one approaching what I wanted was there. It would be sold by the time I got there. I would go out to Mission Viejo, since I have property in Laguna Beach. They would sell out. Eventually my wife was along on one of the trips. The 90's had hit and I really just wanted a 90, she a 110. So in an unusual twist of fate, both a 90 and 110 where there at the same time. She got to drive both. She really did't like the 110, way too big. I didn't either. I like small and maneuverable. If I need a big car for whatever, I'll rent one from Enterprise. I don't have larva to shift around anymore, so the 90 works perfect. It is really the better field vehicle, lot more nimble. So I go back and forth several times, always missing something remotely close. The joke is starting to build momentum in the family. My oldest son is a mining engineer in Oz and my youngest is a NDT engineer. So they both spend a tiny amount of time in the field as well. They are both, "just get something," the Range Rover is getting really long in the tooth. I really can't stomach to actually pay money for a Toyota. Every one I have been given (I get vehicles abroad for my contracts) has crumbled before my eyes or blown its transmission (I have had four Landcruisers blow their trannies). I'm not too terribly thrilled to be driving a Hilux in Namibia, it is what is given to me, but they are not what people think. I have actually had one throw a brake caliper! Their interior is really cheap and everything comes off in your hand. They just couldn't find me a Ford Ranger (Land Rovers are not for rent) the new ones are passable in the field. Use them in both SA and Oz and seem to hold up provided you get decent tires on them. At least this Hilux is supposed to have a locking rear diff. I suppose it will blow up on me for a treat. I really won't forget the SPOT transmitter this year.
I just got tired of waiting for one in the color I wanted, something close to the interior and options I thought where kinda cool. I could not stomach yet another green Land Rover (going on three so far) I'm done with grey and white had those. Had a bright silver RR in Qatar, and a gold P63. Surprisingly the gold works well with the snow crud on the car, not an option. I finally after the third trip to Mission Viejo, no joy, I gave in and ordered one at Scottsdale. That started the jokes, it just keeps having some kind of issue all along the way. It even had to hang out crossing the canal waiting for the tsunami! Then another cable, the first of a series in the port (23 days in port). Now it gets to the dealer DOA. Believe me, the kids have been piping in about the burning boat. I suppose if my prospective father in law was still around, he would be having a stroke about now.
So lets see if they can use something besides Platypus, I'll suggest they try the quills of the Echidna. It appears I got all the Eagle Beak inlays I ordered. I think, but I will know for sure. Got to go down the mountain to Phoenix next week. I shall visit it in the hospital, maybe bring a card. I have to drop off the 206H engine for inspection and both of the propellers for overhaul. The Range Rover looks super silly when I put the prop on the roof rack, kind of like one of those old propeller beanies. If this truck does not get released before the trip I will never live this down. The sales dude called on Friday, no word from UK. I think the cable, while of exotic materials for sure, is actually made in the Ukraine. Perhaps Land Rover Special Vehicles unit has contacts with the partisans who may be able to spirt it across the lines. I remain ever hopeful. I am fairly sure their is more comedy in store with this truck, the Universe is always laughing behind my back.
Just an aside here: some years ago UNC-Chapel Hill released average starting salaries for recent graduates by different departments. All but Geology were "normal" amounts and what one might expect. Geology was some huge amount, I don't remember what, but it was stratospheric and the most of any earned degree.
It turned out that the salaries for Geology included Michael Jordan, after he went pro.
Geology enrollment spiked after the report.
Aside/Aside: Do you read John McPhee? Incredible Geology writer.
I will have to check out McPhee, always looking for something to read. Years as an expat has laid bare the shelves of reading material. Thanks. Geology and airplanes, in the words of a now deceased Saturday Night Player, "been berry berry good to me." Well if you kind of detach the military part of aviation, I was in the test program, not the Chuck Yeager stuff, engineering stuff on existing aircraft. Three crashes (we call a class A, over 1 mil damage a crash) two on fire 5 complete engine failures and the record at North Island for emergency recoveries. Heck I even had a rudder fall off on one. That kind of drained the adrenaline sack. So I transferred my commission to NOAA, the guys who are so dim they will fly into, not away from hurricanes. At least I could apply my geology degree there. Turns out, NOAA stands for "No Organization At All." Or the "National Organization for the Advancement of Alcoholics." Bunch of drunken *****. I left and started my own thing and have not looked back in decades. With the market what it is for raw materials and the environmental issues involved. Geology, Geotech and Mining Engineering are all doing beyond well now. But that is funny how some sports **** can skew everything, surprised he even reported his salary to the Uni gods.
Still nothing this morning from the lords of humor, Land Rover, about the cable. Doesn't matter, if it was not done today, I can't get down the mountain now to get it, 16" of snow and 35-40 kt winds for the next two days. I believe that is called a "Blizzard." I don't know why I rushed pulling the engine on the aircraft, truck can't come and get it.
Had this made, geo humor. Now if I only had a truck to put it on...
I owned a Meyers Aero Commander 200D for years. Had to give it up when avgas went to $2 per gallon. At the time I could afford the plane, not the gas.
Mcphee had a series in the New Yorker about the geology of Wyoming and how no one could explain it. It became a book called, 'Rising from the Plains'. He writes about various topics. Here's a list:
A light spears the night over an oily calm sea, three long, three short. The long black shape silently broaches the surface forming the silhouette of a sub on the moonlit sea. An old 1.6 hp Seagull engine burps to life on a deserted stretch of the Welsh shoreline. A small dingy slowly makes its way to the sub and bumps up against its side. A man silently passes down a black wrapped package. Briefly, a shaft of moonlight illuminates it surface, revealing a small green oval. The dingy slowly makes its way back to the shore. The men, dressed in black get into an old Series Land Rover and rattle down the country lane, with only a small pale blue plume to show where it has been.
The Rover makes it to a small airport where the package is passed without ceremony to the crew of a plane owned by a former Marine OV-10 pilot. It is carried over to Heathrow airport and again passed to another crew of a brightly painted cargo jet. It methodically makes its way to Memphis in the USA and makes an orderly journey to Phoenix. Where it is dispatched by special armed courier to Scottsdale and placed in the hands of a highly trained specialist, wearing a forest green uniform of the legendary Land Rover’s tech support group. The package is opened to reveal a one of a kind cable, which is then precisely clipped in several places to a dormant, new Defender 90. After a while, the technician, nodding with satisfaction, presses the start button. Quickly the machines comes to life, quickly checking all its system are working properly and purrs to life.
The temple of Land Rover informs the new owner, sitting with expectation, nursing an excellent latte. He shoots up from his chair, rushing to see the new born vehicle. Beaming, he passes a cashier’s check to the waiting sales rep, who passes the sacred key to the new owner. This sacred right passes the ownership of this magnificent machine to the new owner.
Sadly, this is not what has happened. The sub sank, the dingy crew was arrested for loitering. The package never came. So another week passes and this elusive cable seems to be ground into the mud by Russian tanks. Nobody knows where it is. The excellent computer system says it was supposed to be in UK on Wednesday, but still shows as not there.
02-18-2022, 09:12 AM
